In the still, cold dark I lie in wait.

Waiting for the end.
Waiting for a solace from this fight.
I cannot hide the cuts, the bruises, the signs of our struggle.
You are the scars that mark my soul.
Marks and scars I bear for you, visible in the night.
Battle scars a painful reminder of the death of faith.
My soul stripped to its barest minimum.
Lover lost, enemy gained.
Anger wells as tears roll down my cheeks.
Enough was never enough for you.
Stripped of my faith in the light, I cry out.
I can no longer forgive your transgressions.
Weakness now my only companion.
Nights and days of turmoil, eating me alive.
Forever hating the silence.
Marks and scars I bear for you, visible in the night.
Battle scars a painful reminder of the death of faith.
Tears roll as fear drowns out the silence.
Fighting the screams of the past no more.
Faith lost, I search for the end.
This sweet sacrifice is mine as I walk to the edge.
A soul wrenched apart by mistrust in you.
Wind whipped and hell torn.
An empty void within my soul, life no longer.
Scarred by your absence.
Marks and scars I bear for you, visible in the night.
Battle scars a painful reminder of the death of faith.

Running

memories grabbing at the flesh of my soul
tearing me apart
ripping old wounds
never hidden
never healed
darkness creeping in amongst silent screams
running
falling
dragged into the abyss
fear and familiarity wrapping me in cold
no more fighting
surrender the option
giving up
letting go
running
falling
weaker than before
salvation a lie
your face swarms my mind
my heart
my soul

freedom in release

soul in chains

running

falling

dragged into the abyss

sweet sacrifice of life

darkness embraced

running

falling

dragged into the abyss

Life, as we know it.

Life, as we know it. .
Maybe in the end, its not what we thought.
Maybe when we look back, we will say that we should have known.
Different. Now there is a concept. I doubt it's existence. No one is as different as they think they are. No matter how hard they try and prove their theory, all they do is prove mine.
Don't tell me you know what I'm going through. You don't. Simple.
Don't call yourself a friend when all u do is seek your own gain.
Genuine does not even exist in this life, as we know it.
Honesty, trust and worth, what are these? Concepts to candy coat.
Inside is irrelevant and outside gives value.
Don't even get me started on love. 
Relationships are sadly not what we dream of and what we hope for. 
The norm today is pain, anguish, distrust and disillusionment.
Failure was never an option, now it is a given.
Life, as we know it, is purely an illusion. 

Sunshine giggles

Jelly tot kisses
Rainbow smiles
Sticky finger cuddles
Love so pure contained in a being so beautiful
Mud pies
Water slides
Sunday afternoon drives
Ice cream sundaes
Life so pure contained in a being so beautiful
Midnight movies
Lazy morning snuggles
Secret games
Magic times
Love & Life in my being so beautiful

My heart racing in my chest, our eyes meet.

Weak at the knees as your eyes search mine

Looking into my very soul, the way only you can

Glancing away I break your spell on me

Your breath so soft and gentle


My eyes return your gaze; I have no escape from you


The one who owns my heart


Trembling as your fingers brush my cheek, I let you in


I had been facing the dark for so long, but no more


Your light has taken over me


Silently a solitary tear rolls down my face


The coming of this moment has been too long


Quietly you pull me close and I feel myself surrender


The magic of your touch guiding me to the light

Again your eyes search my inner being and I let you in

You have taken over my heart and soul

Gently as you whisper my name light streams in

The dark now dawn I reach out, step into day and breathe new life…

I had been facing the dark for so long, but no more

Your light has taken over me

My Lover and I...

Smashing into silence like a knife into flesh our cries hit the air / Trembling quietly as we ride the clouds / I am you and you are me / Inside and out my lover I am yours / Gripping and grinding at flesh / Greedily wanting more / Quickly we climb then gently we soar / My lover and I we see the stars / Feel the moisture of lust / This time this space is ours / My lover and I / Aching to stay together / Dying slowly while we are apart / Taking my hand you lead me there / Eyes closed with passion / Grace and splendor as we drive to the edge / The edge of our cliff / My lover and I / The world outside they know us not / In our secret place / Sanctity and love / Smashing into silence like a knife into flesh our cries hit the air / My lover and I…

Enough....

All I’ve ever done was never good enough.


Not me, not who I am.

I was not enough for you.

Always pushing, always bleeding me dry.

I’m tapping out, I cannot fight anymore.

I need to go but before I do, tell me I’m good enough.



When I’m gone don’t cry for me, I wasn’t enough.

I will no longer be around to disappoint you,

Won’t ever be the one making you frown.

You can be happy now once it’s done, it will be good enough.

I’m tapping out, I cannot fight anymore.

I need to go but before I do, tell me I’m good enough.



I used to dream of making u say it.

Making you look at me like that, the way you looked at others.

In the end I guess it was not for me, to be enough.

I never was, will never hear it…

I’m tapping out, I cannot fight anymore.

I need to go but before I do, tell me I’m good enough.